365 Days, 365 Movies: February

This year, I made a resolution to keep track of everything I watch and listen to: movies, television, podcasts, live performances, etc. I also resolved to watch 365 different movies over the course of the calendar year. After January, I realized that it won't be easy, it won't be pretty, but, godammit, somebody needs to do it.

February was a big one, with The Oscars and the Series Finale of Parks and Recreation. But those two events didn't make up the entirety of my month. Not hardly. Without further ado, I present all of the pop culture I consumed in February of 2015. Don't judge me; I'm actually proud of this:

85+ Things I'll Miss About 'Parks and Recreation'

Click on this -- it gets a lot bigger!

It's hard to put into words how much I love Parks and Recreation. Right now, mere hours after the series finale, I'm having a hard time emotionally preparing for a world without it. For seven years, the residents of Pawnee, Indiana have brought happiness and laughter into my home and homes around the world.  Not a ton of homes, but a solid number. Like, consistently in the millions.

While the last season of Parks (and the finale) wasn't always the funniest television, it did work to send the characters we love off in style, showcasing the many strengths of the show. And since I can't seem to form my love of the show into complete sentences, I'm just going to list a bunch of things that I will miss about Parks and Recreation:

Chris Pratt Will Not Get Fat

At some point during the pole dance for Marvel's Guardians of the Galaxy, Chris Pratt went from being an affable everyman who oozed charm to an affable everyman who couldn't stop talking about his workout regimen and his (admittedly substantial) weight-loss. It wasn't annoying, per se. It definitely needed to be talked about to some extent (the previously fat elephant in the room), but, near the end of his time promoting GotG, the subject was wearing thin. Many people longed for the days of a slightly less svelte, and slightly more endearing, Chris Pratt.

Recently, while crowning Pratt as one of 2014's Men of the Year, GQ broached the 'fat or not fat' question. To the annoyance of chubby chasers the world over (including Pratt's wife, Anna Faris), it seems like Chris Pratt is staying thin. Asked if we'll ever see Fat Pratt again, he only had this to say:

"I'm done with that"

So, it's good news for Pratt's blood pressure and cholesterol, bad news for fans of a chunkier Andy Dwyer on Parks and Recreation:

Good by, Chris Pratt's muffin top. You're 5,000 Candles in the Wind.

Poehler Vortex

And now a completely timely GIF of the recent storms hitting the United States (#PoehlerVortex). Plus, last night was the 100th episode of Parks and Recreation and Ms. Amy is also co-hosting the Golden Globes this weekend. Everything's coming up Poehler!

Parks and Recreation: Leslie Knope 2012!

On Thursday’s Parks and Recreation, we saw the awesomeness that was a Leslie Knope political campaign commercial (Knope 2012!).

Turns out, Leslie hates attack ads so much that she makes the most 'pro' commercial the world has ever seen.

It was so amazing that we here at Tableau Your Mind wanted to show you the full list of things Leslie is ‘pro’ and point out some of the many great jokes. There is a lot here for fans of the show, from Leslie's hatred of libraries to the well-documented raccoon problem. After the jump, check out all 123 of Leslie’s pros and try to figure out how she can accomplish all of this in one term (we believe in her).

TV Review: House of Lies

You can't see what's under those bars.
She can, but you can't

House of Lies premieres this Sunday on Showtime, and, thanks to the lovely people at Showtime and the venerable artists of YouTube, the pilot was available for viewing ahead of time (sans Showtime’s trademark nudity). The show stars Don Cheadle (Hotel Rwanda, Rush Hour 2) as Marty Kaan, management consultant and family man. His life is very of-the-moment. He consults for the 1% yet uses the 99% to aid him in his endeavors. In the real world his life would be enviable, with a posh apartment, sexy consorts, and sexier consorts. Except this is a Showtime show, so he is an absolute wreck. The first few minutes of the show find him waking up next to his druggie-ex-wife (who is so out of it that she doesn’t really remember their previous night of boning) and then going into the kitchen to explain to his gender-confused son and his father why ex-wifey is there at all. Then, he flies to New York with his cracker-jack management consultant team, which includes Veronica Mars and Jean Ralphio (Kristen Bell and Ben Schwartz) as well as some other guy (Josh Lawson), all

2011 In Review: Part 1

Man, 2011 was quite the year. Tons of awesome and significant pop culture moments occurred in the past 12 months, both terrible and amazing. There were films, people, ad campaigns, television shows, and basically everything that happens every year.  Below, Tableau recaps the best and the worst (mostly things already covered on this blog).  Not included: Music. Tableau has got no say in that arena.

So check out our incomplete, completely biased review of the year, and let us know (in the comments) if you agree: